Love kit helps fastidious singles

“You often know what you don’t want but are less clear on what you do want. Therefore I have created a set of tools to find the right partner,” says communication designer, Stine Gertsen.

For her graduation project she has designed a game, a stack of question cards, a potential app and a number of post cards that people who are looking for a partner can use at various stages in the search process. Over 1.6 million Danes live alone, so the target group for the extensive love kit is large. As a starting point Stine Gertsen has segmented the singles crowd:

”At the start of my project I studied a lot of data and conducted a questionnaire survey. I learnt that there are roughly three sub-groups of singles: The career person with high expectations who is too busy for love; the hesitant, somewhat passive single; and then the fastidious, searching single with the permanent ‘why-didn’t-I-succeed’ frame of mind. It’s the last group my project is targeting and who I want to equip with some tools,” says the designer.

Single, know yourself
The ultimate outcome of Stine Gertsen’s product is the longstanding relationship and the foundation on which it needs to rest. In order to assure the success rate she has worked closely with coach and couples therapist, Lise Grevenkop-Castenskiold, in order to define the conditions that need to be met in order to find the coveted everlasting love.

“The most important factor is having a deep knowledge of oneself and one’s values. What do you want to accept, what counts, and what are you willing to compromise on? That is the clarification I want my target group to reach. Therefore the solution approaches the dating component very strategically,” says Stine Gertsen.

First play, then date
The first step in the search strategy is a game to be played at home.

“It should be played with friends and family who know you well, because they can help you learn more about yourself. The game is divided into five categories: Love Life, Family Life, Work Life, Household and Health. Once you have played the game with your close network you should be clearer about what you are looking for. Only then should you start dating,” explains Stine Gertsen. “The next step is selecting some of the key question cards from the game, say 10-15 which you can bring to the actual date. They may serve as an ice breaker in the conversation and they may also be helpful in the slightly awkward situation that arises at the end of the date, where you are trying to decide, ‘well, should we meet again?’ Here you can take out the cards and say, ‘in this area we are compatible, here we would probably face some challenges’. You can even evaluate the data together and quickly see if it is a good match.”

More than just physical
The next box in the singles search kit is a weekly package of coach-yourself cards containing things to think about or concrete actions; all help to selfhelp:

“One week for example the task is to clean up your home as if a partner were going to move in. That is a way of making room for love in your life,” says the communication designer. In addition there is an app that is very different from existing dating apps because it focusses on inner values rather than outer physical attraction, which Stine Gertsen believes will quickly fizzle out: “The app matches the five categories from the know-yourself game and asks questions such as ‘would you like to get married’, ‘how many children would you like to have’ and similar questions. You are then matched with the other users of the app who are closest to your answers. There is also an option to upload three images of things that are important to you, not the usual selfies, because this tool is about more than just physical appearance.”

Spread the happy news
Finally the kit contains a number of post cards to be used when you have reached the goal and you can change your civil status from ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’.

“The idea is that you share your positive, happy love story with others to make them realize that it is possible, and so that other fastidious singles will also grab the opportunity to find love,” says Stine Gertsen.

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Fact
In connection with the actual page content of the project Stine Gertsen has worked with the company Mindful Rich based on an existing coaching seminar for singles. The course is developed by couples therapist and coach Lise Grevenkop-Castenskiold.

“It has been a unique experience to work with Stine Gertsen,” she says. “Everyone who has an important message to convey needs to collaborate with a designer. I look forward to a continued partnership with Stine. One of our test persons is right now floating on the pink cloud of love in Aalborg!”